Monday, June 04, 2007

Toy Boys

In its promotional material for the speed dating night at the Aurora Lounge in Sydney's CBD, organisers tempted single men and women with lines including "Prefer to get them young and train them?" and "Boys, do you prefer the allure of experienced older women? Perhaps harbouring a Mrs Robinson fantasy?"

Mrs Robinson Night Launches in Sydney

So, what do you guys think of the older woman-younger man scenario?


BookQueen said...

I'm all for it, but that may be because I'm 4 years older than my husband!

LesleyW said...

I'm positive I read somewhere - and I can't remember where - that the ideal age difference in a relationship is for the woman to be 8 years older than the man. Not sure if this is related to sexual peaks and the fact that women on average will live longer than men.

I think as long as the people involved are happy (and no laws are being broken) then it's okay, whichever way round it goes. Older woman/younger man, or older man/younger woman.

katie g. said...

My mom was 8 years older than my dad. She married him when he was a wee boy of 22. I guess it worked for them as they were married for 35 years before she passed away.

Anonymous said...

I'd say under 10 years, for men or women, is about what I could believe. Like lesleyw said, probably 8 or younger would be preferred.

I remember reading romances where the hero was, like, 15 to 20 years older than the sweet 20 or 21-year-old heroine. That always seemed a little far-fetched to me.

Not that I don't think people can, and do, make that much of an age difference work, but because I don't know what they'd necessarily have in common. All the slang and everything else that's going on as you age would not be the same as your significant other experienced.

Now, what's really disturbing? Anna Nicole Smith when she married the 80-something multimillionaire. Can I just say I DO NOT want to picture any of their sex life ... AT ALL! Blech! *shudder*

Nalini Singh said...

bookqueen - aha, so you have a toyboy *g*

Lesleyw - hmm interesting point about the 8 year dif. I might have to google that!

Katie g - 35 years, that's wonderful. It's so rare to hear about that kind of committment these days.

Jennifer - maybe it's to do with social expectations, too. In the past, marriages between much older men and sweet young things was very acceptable. And even now, as you point out, we see lots of examples.

Personally, I think once you reach a point of adulthood, age differences become less important. But at what point does it restart? Hmm, something to ponder...

Anonymous said...

Nalini, I think it starts when the guy is, maybe in his 40s and dating a girl young enough to be his daughter. That really kind of creeps me out. Your stepmother would be the same age, or even worse, YOUNGER than you? Oh, I can almost see the resentment in the air from the first set of kids.

And you hear about trophy wives. Guys marry a woman who's the same age, and then while she works her butt off to send him to school, he turns around once he's successful and dumps her for a newer, much younger model. Her name, of course, would be Bambi or Crissy or something. (uh, sorry to any Bambis or Crissys reading this).

The new wife will dress in tight clothes, drive a corvette, flash her huge wedding ring with a large and gaudy diamond, etc., and take aerobics every day with a gay guy named Hans so she can stay the perfect size 2.

Man! I'm good at stereotyping, huh?

danetteb said...

I don't have a problem with it,I'm a month older than my husband(believe me,he reminds me every chance he gets) and some might think that's nothing. I've seen couple's where the woman was at least five years older and they're happy. Love defies age IMHO.(as long as its legal)*g*

Ange - The Romance Groupie said...

In real life, I say go for it! If a woman likes younger men there isn't any shame (as long as it's legal, of cours).

I personally can't imagine being attracted to a man 2 or more years younger than me. I am 30 but I am also a college student, therefore I spend a lot of time with people sigificantly younger than me. There are some guys that are cute, I guess, but I feel the urge to mother them, not date them.

Maybe if I was 40 looking at 30-year-old guys....

In romance, no way. I dislike stories where the woman is more that 3 years older than the man. Just a personal preference.

Anonymous said...

By the way, Nalini, I've been meaning to ask you how you pronounce your name.

Of course, it would probably still come out garbled as there would be a STRONG Southern accent, but I've been wondering. In my head, I say it like Nay-lini (like linguini, but with an emphasis on the Nay) and Sing, with a silent h. Is that close?

Anonymous said...

Jennifer, that's close enough LOL If you want to get technical, it's:

Na (like car but shorter) Li (Lee) Ni (Nee)

Singh - yep, Sing

Very easy once you hear it. :)

Anonymous said...

Danette - yep, the legal part's important *g*

Ange - Does it matter how the character is written? I've read stories where the younger man was more mature than the older heroine ie. sort of balancing each other out, and that worked for me.

Jennifer Lewis said...

Bring on the toy boys! Er, I mean I personally am not offended by the idea of older women and younger men. Actually I know several women who happily date men much younger than them. A friend's sister is marrying a (gorgeous and smart) man 25 years her junior. No relationship comes with any guarantees, so go with what works for you!

Jen (who's figured out how to post on blogs again, yay!)

flip said...

Honest, I am not interested in much younger the most, 10 to 15 years youngers...I honestly find men dating women young enough to be their daughters or granddaughters creepy. I certainly don't want to emulate that behavior.

Ange - The Romance Groupie said...

Nalini -
I get hung up on the age difference then end up dissecting everything the hero says and does for signs of immaturity. Just a strange hang-up. I also don't like books in which the woman is more than 40-years-old.

It's all in my mind though, I bet if someone gave me a book with a mature-acting young hero and blocked out the ages, I'd probably be happy as a clam.

Hmmmm... *adopting Freudian expression* I wonder if this is really an indication of a deeper problem. Maybe a subconscious fear of growing older. LOL!

That said, if a favorite author wrote a story with that kind of age difference, I'd buy it and probably enjoy it anyway. I tend to be a loyal reader and keep with authors even through books that aren't exactly to my taste. I do have a few books with an older woman because they're written by favorites.

Jaid said...

I am 16 years older then my husband and we love each other intensely and get along well. I am all for toyboys or boytoys LOL..